Facebook, part the second

Continued from part the first.

Oh, friends. Do I have an update for you.

A very kind author friend who has some serious magic contacted Facebook on my behalf. She told them the troubles I was having and asked them to get in contact.

They did.

At 02.30, they contacted me and her and asked how they could help.

At 06.00, they said you haven’t responded. If you don’t do so soon we’ll close the ticket.

I contacted Meta and said give me a bit, I’ve only just woken up.

I emailed my author friend and thanked her profusely for invoking some kind of magic to actually get a result.

Then, after coffee, I emailed Meta Support and explained the problem.

They thanked me for responding. Of course they called me by my author friend’s name and looped her back into the email.

Then they said they understood the problem and I should let them know a convenient time for a phone call (ugh) and provide a number and blah blah blah.

And then at the bottom, it says ‘Or we can discuss via email.’

I said I would prefer to discuss via email and asked them to please stop including my author friend.

They called me by my author friend’s name and looped her back into the email.

They provided the ticket number and said if I wanted to know more, I could look up the status of the ticket.

I asked how I could look the ticket up, especially as my account is locked.

via GIPHY

They (once again calling me by my author friend’s name and looping her back into the email) said we could only discuss one item per ticket and if I was experiencing other problems, I should open a new ticket.

I should point out their email is coming from one of those systems where it creates a new email address for each ticket, so I literally can only contact them about this ticket, not any other.

I asked what the status of this ticket was.

They (once again calling me by my author friend’s name and looping her back into the email) said this ticket was now closed.

Facebook keeps telling me (well, telling my author friend) that this ticket is closed but that a new ticket has been raised to assist on *this* problem and I can just check that one.

Neither my author friend nor I have received any contact on that ticket. And I can't check that ticket like they keep telling me to do because I'm locked out of Facebook Business.

They've raised a help ticket within Facebook Business to help with the fact I'm locked out of Facebook Business. In order to proceed with the ticket, I just need to respond from inside Facebook Business.

I'm now locked in a permanent loop with Facebook Support.

  • They tell me this ticket is now closed and that I can follow up on the new ticket.
  • I tell them that I have no means of contacting them on the other ticket and no means of checking the other ticket.
  • They tell me this ticket is now closed and that I can follow up on the new ticket.
  • I tell them that I have no means of contacting them on the other ticket and no means of checking the other ticket.
  • They tell me this ticket is now closed and th—

via GIPHY

Continued in part the third.

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